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Foreword

All the texts of the various chapters are available in this area. Both the successful and the failed.

So that - if the chapters have not yet been played through - the tension is maintained, the texts are folded for the time being.

To read, please click on "[Expand]" on the right
Chapter 1 Foggy business
The weather on this British island is crazy! As soon as our Gauls start walking, a thick fog begins to rise again. They can hardly see their hands in front of their eyes!Hopefully, they don't get lost.
Success Fail
Slowly and carefully, the Gauls feel their way forward and lo and behold, when the fog clears, they still seem to be on the right track! Phew! There's no telling what would have happened if they got lost in this strange British landscape. Oh, dear! The whole time our Gauls thought they were on the right track, but it seems they strayed from the path hours ago and are now wandering through the rugged British countryside.How are they supposed to find their way back now?
Chapter 2 Orientation difficulties
The Gauls reach a fork in the road. One path leads up into a hilly forest landscape, the other is winding between rivers and sheep pastures. Hm, what was the description of the Romans again?
Success Fail
Ah, the memory of a Gaul! Not only does it store the best tricks for boar hunting and beating up Romans, it can also remember the most difficult directions! After all, a Gaul never gets lost.Our heroes confidently follow the path between the sheep pastures. Unsure of which direction to go, the Gauls follow the path up into the hilly forests. They walk for hours and hours, but there is no tavern in sight.Oh no, they must have mixed up the directions!
Chapter 3 Counting sheep
Our Gauls are caught off guard when a whole flock of sheep suddenly rushes in their direction. The animals run and jump around in panic, bleating loudly, when our heroes meet a desperate shepherd. The sheep broke away from their annual shearing and are completely out of control now! Can the Gauls help?
Success Fail
Our Gauls manage to catch the sheep in no time. Neatly stacked on top of each other, the Gauls bring them back to the amazed shepherd. Out of gratitude, he gives our heroes a ride to the tavern on his cart! Well, that's what they call British hospitality! One sheep jumps over the fence, and a second sheep jumps over the fence, and a third and ... Yaaaaaawn! Our Gauls get very tired from watching and before they even know what is happening, they have already fallen asleep and the sheep are long gone. Oh dear, that didn't work out the way they planned it!
Chapter 4 Mud and muscle strength
Of course, how could it be any different: On their way to the tavern, rain keeps pouring down and the path quickly turns into mud until the shepherd's cart gets stuck and doesn't even move an inch forward. Muscle strength is now required!
Success Fail
And one, and two and three! With a joint effort, the Gauls pull the cart out of the mud. Unfortunately, one of the wheels breaks in the process, but luckily our heroes are blessed with craftsmanship on top of their muscle power. The cart is repaired quickly and they can continue their way. Heave-ho!! The Gauls manage to pull the cart out of the mud with ease, but oh dear, they have overdone it a bit! One of the wheels breaks and they don't have anything to fix it. What a dilemma!
Chapter 5 British specialities
The tavern is not very busy due to the early evening, only a handful of Romans and a lean, red-haired gentleman, whom the Gauls immediately recognize as Funfax, are sitting at the tables enjoying a round of warm cervisia. Our heroes join Funfax, who immediately orders a huge serving of boiled boar in mint sauce.To avoid attention, the Gauls have to choke down the ghastly food for better or worse!
Success Fail
A true Gaul knows no pain and so they choke down the boiled boar while keeping a straight face. Bravo! Even the Romans get sick from watching. However, when the innkeeper asks if they would like a second serving, they politely decline. After all, they have to pay attention to their figure! Now, it is time to talk to Funfax about the vanishing of Anticlimax. The first bite already has our Gauls shaking from head to toe! Disgusted, they try to wash down the taste with a sip of Cervisia, but what's that? The Cervisia is warm! Yuck! The Gauls were not prepared for the British food and the Romans at the next table are already looking at them very suspiciously. So much for not attracting attention!
Chapter 6 Masterpiece or amateur theater?
Since the Romans are within earshot, Funfax advises the Gauls to imitate a British accent so that the Roman soldiers don't get suspicious. Oh dear, that's easier said than done, but our heroes try their best!
Success Fail
With a brilliant acting performance that would have filled the ranks of the Coliseum, the Gauls flawlessly imitate a British accent that would even fool a real Briton. Funfax is impressed! But oh dear! The centurion at the next table probably had too much warm cervisia and invites our heroes to a game of darts. Oh dear, our Gauls better stick to beating Romans and hunting boars, because they turn in anything but a brilliant performance. Funfax already blushes with shame and the Romans now seem to be very suspicious. Saying nothing would have been probably wiser!
Chapter 7 Playing darts with a Centurio
In order to avoid upsetting the centurion, the Gauls agree to a game of darts. There is nothing wrong with a friendly match, is there? While our heroes are still debating whether it is wiser to let the Centurion win or not, he is already throwing the first arrow! Whoosh! Just past Funfax' head.
Success Fail
Shrewd as our Gauls are, they let the drunken centurion win on purpose to prevent him from getting embarrassed in front of his legionnaires. Of course, he immediately starts bragging about his victory and demands that the loser buys a round of warm cervisia. Oh dear, what's next? Throwing darts in a British tavern or fighting on the battlefield, the Romans are always inferior to the Gauls and lose. Well, it wasn't that difficult either, the centurion hit everything else, just not the dartboard! Nevertheless, annoyed by his defeat, he starts bugging our heroes more and more, keeping them from discussing their plans.
Chapter 8 Old acquaintance
The centurion is still bragging about his victory when the front door flies open and a soaking wet Roman patrol stumbles into the tavern. Oh dear, it's the Romans from the beach! Hurry, before they recognize our Gauls.
Success Fail
Before the newly arrived Romans can even say “Boiled boar in mint sauce”, our Gauls and Funfax snuck out of the back door. Now quickly, before the Romans notice anything! The Gauls barely got up from their chairs when one of the Romans calls out: “Hey, these are the Gauls from the beach! Stop them!" Oh dear! Before our heroes can do anything, they are already surrounded by Romans.
Chapter 9 Up and away!
“Wait a minute, weren't those these darned Gauls ?!”, our heroes hear a call from the tavern. Oh dear, oh dear, now they have to make a quick getaway before the Romans arrest them!
Success Fail
Fortune smiles upon our Gauls! Behind the tavern, they find cart and horse with which they can set off straight away! Just in time, because the Romans hurry out of the tavern and give chase. Since there are no means of escape available, the Gauls and Funfax set off on foot, but oh no, the Romans don't need long to catch up to them. By Toutatis!

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Last modified on 15 February 2023, at 10:47